• Social Death.

    An odd title maybe, but I am not talking about the effect of an ill thought out remark at a dinner party.

    Social death is what may happen as people retire from all that is famililar to them through ill health such as dementia or the time when people enter the world of palliative care. Things are done for them often not by them.Their opinions begin to loose impact or are maybe not heard at all.They are seen, they breath but they may cease to be included or are unable to be included in decisions or to be truly interacted with. It can be a choice. It can be the consequence of the great busyness of those supporting the person who is becoming frail or, of course it maybe like me today just withdrawing from all that is noisey. I may not be interacting with anyone today but the difference is, I could if I wanted to. All this has come to mind as I am finishing a paper for a confrence in June on Social death.

    It impacts my work as a funeral celebrant if when planning a funeral the family can only bring to mind those last retiring, quiet, low impact years and months when thinking about the person who has died. Our last metaphorical moment should not define us, the many years before this moment should so while you are still making your opnions heard talk to those close to you about the things that have made you happy, what lightens your soul, what brightens your day, what you did when you were 17, why you loved those purple velvet flares!

    Give those around you a new definition of you. Most of us feel so much younger than we really are and our children find it hard to imagine us at 17 not being privy the stories that we carry in our hearts... so share them.

    Something beautiful remains.

    The tide recedes

    But leaves behind

    Bright shells on the seashore.

    The sun goes down

    But gentle warmth

    still lingers on the land.

    The music stops yet

    it lingers on in sweet refrains

    For every joy that passes

    something beautiful remains.



Su Chardgw2go

A Great Way to Go


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Welcome to my blog

I will ponder on the things that my work as a celebrant and workshop facilitator offer me.

I hope you enjoy reading it...

june 09 008

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